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Sunday, August 31, 2008

Back to school: When your child is bullyed

With the school season already here, there are so many things to think about besids homework. When our little ones are at school, we think about their safety getting TO school, but we do not really think about bullying. Bullying is when one child picks on another child repeatedly. Bullying can be physical, verbal, or social. It can happen at school, on the playground, on the school bus, in the neighborhood, or over the Internet.

When Your Child Is Bullied

  • Help your child learn how to respond by teaching your child how to:

1. Look the bully in the eye.
2. Stand tall and stay calm in a difficult situation.
3. Walk away.

  • Teach your child how to say in a firm voice.

1. "I don't like what you are doing."
2. "Please do NOT talk to me like that."
3. "Why would you say that?"

  • Teach your child when and how to ask for help.
  • Encourage your child to make friends with other children.
  • Support activities that interest your child.
  • Alert school officials to the problems and work with them on solutions.
  • Make sure an adult who knows about the bullying can watch out for your child's safety and well-being when you cannot be there.

When Your Child Is the Bully

  • Be sure your child knows that bullying is never OK.
  • Set firm and consistent limits on your child's aggressive behavior.
  • Be a positive role mode. Show children they can get what they want without teasing, threatening or hurting someone.
  • Use effective, non-physical discipline, such as loss of privileges.
    Develop practical solutions with the school principal, teachers, counselors, and parents of the children your child has bullied.

When Your Child Is a Bystander

  • Tell your child not to cheer on or even quietly watch bullying.
  • Encourage your child to tell a trusted adult about the bullying.
  • Help your child support other children who may be bullied.
  • Encourage your child to include these children in activities.
  • Encourage your child to join with others in telling bullies to stop.

We cannot be there at all times for our children, but we can watch out for the warning signs and keep the communication open with them. Talk to your kids. Be open with them and they will tell you how their day at school was... Good and bad.

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3 comments:

Jean said...

Thanks for the article. I didn't realize this starts in kindergarten already. My little son said boys were calling him mean names at recess.

Stacey Moore said...

great post! as a teacher this is something that i am always on the lookout for!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting this. My son began middle school last year & was bullied by a student that was twice his size. Unfortunately, due to fear, he didn't tell me about it until 2 months before school ended.

I called the asst. principal the very next day (morning) & by day's end, the asst. principal called me back & said he'd taken care of the issue.

He had called the bullier to his office & had a talk w/him & it just so happened that this little boy was trying out for football. The asst. principal told this little boy if he didn't stop, he'd make SURE he didn't make the team. And, do you know, not another incident happened~praise the Lord!

It was heartbreaking though~to know that your child experienced that. I say do everything that you've mentioned in this post & ALSO, make sure to notify the administration @ the school so that they can step in.

Great article :)